Blond joke...
by missP on Thu Apr 29, 2010 7:13 pm
A man who just died is taken to the local mortuary. He is wearing a very expensive and high quality tailored blue suit.

The mortician is a blonde female and she asked the wife of the deceased man how she would like the body to be dressed.

The mortician also said that the deceased does look very distinguished in the blue suit that he is already wearing.

The widow, however, said that she always preferred her husband in black, and that she would like him in a black suit.

She gives the blonde mortician a signed, blank cheque and says, "Spend whatever you need no matter what the cost, but please have my husband in a well tailored black suit for the viewing."

The woman returns the next day for the viewing and to her delight, her dead husband is indeed dressed in a fabulous black suit. The suit fits him as if it were tailor made.

She said to the mortician, "You have done a magnificent job and I'm very pleased and grateful. How much did the suit cost?"
To her amazement, the blonde mortician gives her back the blank cheque.

"There's no charge," she says.

"No, really, I must repay you for the cost of that exquisite black suit!" she says.

"Honestly," the blonde says, "It cost me nothing. You see, a deceased gentleman of about your husband's size was brought in yesterday shortly after you left, he was dressed in a very attractive black suit. I asked his wife if she minded him going to his grave wearing a beautifully tailored blue suit instead, and she said it did not make any difference as long as he looked good...

So... I just swapped their heads."



bash bananas bash bananas bash bananas bash

Happy 2010- Halina't maki Fiesta!!!
by missP on Mon Jan 25, 2010 6:41 am
It's 2010. A new year, a new leash in life, a new beginning! However we look at it, or even say it, the year brings change to us. A chance to start a new. A time to correct whatever wrongs we have done or do better at any chance we get this time. Chance and opportunity.

How has it been so far? After 25 days into the new year, I can't complain so far. It looks like it will be a nice year. Hopefully no more Ondoy-like tragedies for our kababayans in the Philippines. As for me, I went back to work on a slower pace this time. I think my schedule next month will be more heavier than this month. But then again, I just got back from the Philippines middle of January. This means, I haven't really started working full-scale officially.

Here in Germany, well, some friends of mine I are now preparing for the next event specially organized for the street kids in Iloilo. A Barrio Fiesta is scheduled to take place on June 26, 2010 in Griesheim-Frankfurt am Main. Lease on stalls where one can sell regional Philippine delicacies is possible. There is also a "Little Miss Philippines" contest scheduled during the said event. Mothers or Parents interested to let their beautiful little girls join the contest, please you can contact any Philippine Mission Charity Foundation (PMCF) organizer around Frankfurt am Main area or leave a note here or email me at missp.99@gmail.com.

Those who are interested to sell during the Fiesta, you can also contact any PMCF orgaizer or just leave me a note at missp.99@gmail.com. I will be happy to refer you to anyone of the organizers. Please take note that, due to space limitations of the place where the event will be held, the stalls are limited and are only offered on a first come-first serve basis. The sooner you and your group will book a stall, the more chance of you getting one. "Kung interesado po kayo, paki lagay lang po sa lihim niyo, kung galing sa anong rehiyon ang mga putahe na inyong iluluto at ibe-benta sa ating Barrio Fiesta. Maari po kayong kumontak sa mga miyembro ng PMCF at pwede din po kayong mag iwan ng mensahe dito sa website na ito o kaya ay sumulat sa akin sa missp.99@gmail.com. Ipapaalam ko po kaagad sa mga organizer ang request niyo".

Magkita-kita po tayo sa June 26. Maaga pa kaya pwede niyo nang ilagay sa inyong kalendaryo ang event na ito. Everybody is invited to join the Barrio Fiesta in Griesheim-Frankfurt on June 26, 2010. The event is open to the public.
Happy long weekend to all.
by missP on Sat Nov 28, 2009 1:21 am
Laugh at life...a good way to kick off a long weekend for some of us. Sa Pinas, holiday daw sa Lunes.. AB day... Hindi AB(normal). Andres Bonifacio Day. Alala niyo pa siya.. Andres Bonifacio, atapang atao, pagsapit ng gulo... una takbo! Hehe, lagi ko yang naririnig noong nag aaral pa ako. I think sa EB ko yan actually unang narinig. PAkana nina VST & Co..

Eto naman, share ko lang, before I disappear again, but this time only for the weekend. Pwamis! Smile

Over dinner, a woman said to her husband, "I met this horrible and rude man in town this morning, and right away I knew he was a trouble maker. He started insulting me and used really bad language. Do you know, he even threatened me!"

"How did you meet this fellow?", asked the husband very concerned.

The wife replied, "By accident really. I hit him with the car."
Chinese for beginners:
by missP on Wed Nov 25, 2009 10:31 am
English: Are you harboring a fugitive?

Chinese: Hu Yu Hai Ding?

English: Small Horse

Chinese: Tai Ni Po Ni

English: I thought you were on a diet.

Chinese: Wai Yu Mun Ching?

English: He's cleaning his automobile.

Chinese: Washing Ka.

English: I think you need a facelift.

Chinese: Chin Tu Fat.

English: Did you go to the beach?

Chinese: Wai Yu So TAn?

English: An unauthorized execution.

Chinese: Lin Ching

English: I bumped into a coffee table.

Chinese: Ai BAng Mai Ni

English: Has your flight been delayed?

Chinese: Hao Long Wei Ting?

PINOYS & PINAYS BORN IN THE 50's, 60's &, 70's !
by missP on Sun Nov 22, 2009 11:23 pm
As an ice breaker after such a longggggggg silence, I want to share this with those who grew
with a more simple childhood. We were very lucky indeed to have experienced how it is to be real kids na lumaki sa kalye? (...on the block? hehe).

First, some of us survived being born to mothers who did not have an OB-Gyne, who smoked and/or drank San Miguel Beer or Syoktong, while they carried us. The manghihilot was the cheapest way to deliver babies. Dinala ka ba ng nanay mo sa pediatrician for DPT? While pregnant, they took cold or cough medicine, cortal or medicol, ate isaw, and didn't worry about diabetes or cervical cancer.

Then after all that trauma, our baby cribs were made of hard wood covered with lead-based paints, pati na yung walker (andador)natin, matigas na kahoy or rattan at wala pang gulong.

We had no soft cushy cribs that play music, no disposable diapers (lampin lang), ( noon cloth or rattan duyan lang tied to the posts or ceiling, babies would fall asleep sa sobrang hilo ) and when we rode our bikes, we had no helmets, no kneepads, sometimes wala pang preno yung bisikleta.

Take-out food was limited to Ongpin's pansit or Aling Toyang's pre-cooked ulam in kalderos. No pizza shops, McDonalds, KFC, Subway, Jollibee; and, coffee was just kape hinde ga-mahal as in Starbucks.

As children, we would ride in jeepneys libre pag kandong,hot un-airconditioned buses with wooden seats (yung JD bus na pula), or cars with no airconditioning & no seat belts (ngayon lahat may aircon na)

Riding on the back of a carabao on a breezy summer day was considered a treat. (ngayon hindi na nakakakita ng kalabaw ang mga bata) Did you make your own saranggola and pasted bubog on the strings?

We drank water from the garden hose and NOT from a bottle purchased from 711(minsan straight from the faucet or poso) walang711noon, sari-sari store ni Mang Akong to buy sarsi, suntan, RC cola or choco-vim

We shared one soft drink bottle with four of our friends, and NO ONE actually died from this or contracted hepatitis.

We ate rice with star margarine, pampatangkad daw, took raw eggs straight from the shell, and drank softdrinks with real sugar in it (hindi diet coke), but we weren't sick or overweight kasi nga.......


WE WERE ALWAYS OUTSIDE PLAYING!!

We would leave home in the morning and play all day, and get back when the streetlights came on. Sarap mag patintero, tumbang preso, habulan at taguan. hindi uso ang kidnap-kidnap na yan, safe maglaro sa labas.Tandaanmo ba PIKO, step-no-step- yes, trumpo, garter & mala-ahas sa haba na goma? Kung naulan, jackstones, pick-up sticks or sungka, bahay-bahayan, tinda-tindahan, titser-teacher- an or swimming sa baha or kangkungan.

No one was able to reach us all day (di uso ang cellphone, walang beepers). And yes, we were O.K. Sipol lang ni tatay ang meron noon!

We would spend hours building our wooden trolleys (yung bearing ang gulong) or plywood slides out of scraps and then ride down the street, only to find out we forgot the brakes! After hitting the sidewalk or falling into a canal (sewage channel) a few times, we learned to solve the problem ourselves with our bare & dirty hands.

We did not have Playstations, Nintendo's, X-boxes, no video games at all, no 100 channels on cable, no DVD movies, no surround stereo, no IPOD's, no cellphones, no computers, no Internet, no chat rooms, and no Friendsters, Facebook. MSN etc. ........ ...WE HAD REAL FRIENDS and we went outside to actually talk and play with them!TV viewing was a treat, kilala mo ba si Popeye, Gumby, Betty Boop & followed the bouncing ball in Melody Tunes? That was karaoke then, LOL!

We climbed walls and trees (to get aratiles and catch salagubang & tutubi - tied them on the neck or buntot with a string),fell out of trees, got cut or "bukol", broke bones and teeth and there were no stupid lawsuits from these accidents. The only rubbing we get is from our friends with the words...masakit ba ? pero pag galit yung kalaro mo,,,,ang sasabihin sa iyo..beh buti nga !

We played marbles (jolens) in the dirt , washed our hands just a little and ate dirty ice cream, fish balls & inihaw sa baga We were not afraid of getting sick or getting germs in our stomachs.

We had to live with homemade guns, gawa sa kahoy, tinali ng rubberband , sumpit , tirador at kung ano ano pa na puedeng makasakitan, pero masaya pa rin ang lahat. We made up games with sticks (syatong), and cans (tumbang preso) and although we were told they were dangerous, wala naman tayong binulag o napatay... paminsan minsan may nabubukulan lang.

We walked a lot, rode bikes, or took tricycles to a friend's house and knocked on the door or rang the bell, or just yelled for them to jump out the window!

Mini basketball teams had tryouts and not everyone made it to the team. Those who didn't pass had to learn to deal with the disappointment. Wala iyang mga childhood depressions at damaged self esteem ek-ek na yan. Ang pikon, talo.

Ang magulang ay nandoon lang para tingnan kung ayos lang ang mga bata, hindi para makialam at makipag-away sa ibang parents.

That generation of ours had produced some of the best risk-takers, problem solvers, creative thinkers and successful professionals ever! They are the CEO's, Engineers, Doctors and Military Generals of today.

The past 50 years have been an explosion of innovation and new ideas....

We had failure, success, and responsibility. We learned from our mistakes the hard way.

Two-liners
by missP on Fri Jul 24, 2009 9:33 am
I love my friends, I keep in touch with them as much as I can. I definitely miss them whenever I don't get to see them. Therefore, I am always happy when I get a little note, a letter or even a forwarded mail from them. Anything! --- Okay, some of the forwarded mails can be annoying and I like neither the scary ones nor the threathening mails. But every once in a while, i get those that make one smile, too. Reading them never fails to put that silly grin on my face.

THESE ARE ENTRIES TO A WASHINGTON POST COMPETITION
ASKING FOR A TWO-LINE RHYME WITH THE MOST ROMANTIC FIRST LINE,
AND THE LEAST ROMANTIC SECOND LINE:


1. My darling, my lover, my beautiful wife:
Marrying you has screwed up my life.

2. I see your face when I am dreaming.
That's why I always wake up screaming.

3. Kind, intelligent, loving and hot;
This describes everything you are not.

4. Love may be beautiful, love may be bliss,
But I only slept with you 'cause I was pissed.

5. I thought that I could love no other
-- that is until I met your brother.

6. Roses are red, violets are blue, sugar is sweet, and so are you.
But the roses are wilting, the violets are dead, the sugar bowl's
empty and so is your head.

7. I want to feel your sweet embrace;
But don't take that paper bag off your face.

8. I love your smile, your face, and your eyes
Damn, I'm good at telling lies!

9. My love, you take my breath away.
What have you stepped in to smell this way?

10. My feelings for you no words can tell,
Except for maybe 'Go to hell.'

11. What inspired this amorous rhyme?
Two parts vodka, one part lime.

WHO SAID POETRY IS BORING?

LP 64: KANDADO
by missP on Fri Jul 03, 2009 4:51 pm


Ang entry ko pong ito ay para sa LP64 topic po. Para sa Linggong ito, hindi po BAG ang paksa natin. Ang paksa po natin ay “KANDADO”. Wala po kasi akong mahagilap na litrato ng kandado kaya naisip ko kunan nalang itong paborito kong bag na may “kandado” ng litrato.

Ayan, ito po ang patunay na ang kandado, hindi lamang para sa sekuridad ginagamit ng tao. Pang desenyo din po to. Madami din iba’t-ibang klase ng kandadong pang desenyo, may maliit na pang duwende at meron din namang malaki na pang higante.

Yung sa akin ay katamtaman lang. Ang masaklap lang nito, mabigat ang bag ko. Wala pa man itong laman ay halos one kilo na ang timbang nito. Can you imagine pag inilagay ko na ang lahat ng abubot ko sa bag? May tatlong cellphone, wallet, id sa work, camera, pencil case, stapler, filer for work, compact powder, lipstick, hand sanitizer at maliit na bote ng mouthwash to name some. Sadya naman talagang sakit ng balikat ako at the end of the day! Hahaha… vanity!

Happy Beerday sa lahat ng may kaarawan sa buwan na ito… Kasama na rin po ang Tatay ko Wink
Dito lang
by missP on Fri Jun 26, 2009 8:42 am
Masayang Huwebes po sa inyong lahat. Grabe, ang dami ko nang Huwebes na namiss sa LP. Pero ok lang, cos i'm back to yak, hehehe!


Chinese dragon w/white chinamen, (hehehe). In fairness, there is one Asian looking guy in the group. Hanapin... (can you spot him?)




The street in front of my sibs' house. It was closed to traffic the whole day. Cars had to be parrked somewhere else, phewww!


Square dancing with the Americans.



The main attraction girls from Brazil. This is supposed to be my entry for the "Impossibe Ba Ito" (LP62) week. In wintertime, take note of the two girls dancing barefoot and almost naked to the bones Wink