Ambitions

Are you lost, too?
by missP on Sat Aug 26, 2006 8:57 am
“How may I help you? What can I do for you? You seem lost.” Most of the time, I don’t even need to add the last phrase, since the person I am addressing would admit it to me anyway. These are questions I oftentimes ask at work. This is what I do. I feel good whenever I can be of service to somebody else. Knowing that in some little way I have helped somebody for the day. Most times, I wonder if any one of these people I would eventually meet in heaven (ala TFPYMIH) someday and if they would say to me, “Hey, you helped me once, I remember” or if they would say, “Hey, you are the reason why I am here today”. Meaning that in some ways, my help to them turned out to be their end instead. For this reason, I am afraid. This is the responsibility that goes along with trying to be helpful, or should I say, the hassles?

In any case, I still utter the question day after day, as much as I can. Not just at work but also when I am on the road in a PUV, at a mall or at the grocer’s. I try to give only the information that I am most certain is true. Otherwise, I would rather send them somewhere else to ask. At the end of the day, I still feel good knowing that I helped somebody, anybody.

But this doesn’t keep me from thinking if I am also lost myself. Sometimes, in the quiet moments during the day, while taking a break from work or just being alone at home, I often ask myself if I too need help from somebody. Am I in the right place or situation that I am in currently? If I am happy with where I am now and what I am doing to keep me busy presently. I constantly ask myself if I am really destined to be where I am now.

Contented? Yes I definitely am. I have actually nothing else to ask for. Well, okay, just one more thing. But I am prepared for any answers I would get as to “that” special request. Dreams? Well most of them have materialized already but there is still one or two, that until now I don’t have any idea how to make them come true. In this sense, I can very well say I myself am also lost. I also need assistance. Just a bit of nudge in the right direction would actually do, I think. Some kind of clue is all that I need. Somewhere out there is a person fated to tell me this or show me the right way. There are signs everywhere, I know, but sometimes one just needs to be reminded of one’s fate, one’s destiny. I am one of them too, you see. Wink

:cry: :cry: !!!
by missP on Thu Nov 17, 2005 9:23 am
bouncenburn bouncenburn

My fingers are sore from learning to play the guitar. They’re warm and swollen and they hurt like hell. It has been a while. My father taught me how to play the guitar years ago, being a professional guitarist himself, but I was never patient enough, hence, I never learned. Regrets???? Yes, big time!

For now, i have to sweat and learn...and have to disregard what my stenography and typing teacher Ms, villafranca taught me, "to type using all ten fingers and not just with one or two". Imagine me typing using only my pinkies and thumbs. BUwahahhahaaha!

And all these for what? Just so I can play "jamaica farewell" and "country roads"... well, At least I am learning. I can indeed play the two songs now, but I actually want to do my own version of "Both Sides Now".


Hayyy, kelan pa kaya yun?

bash bash
Kung may Himala...
by missP on Sun Jun 26, 2005 3:44 am
bananas bananas
The verdict is out! Sabi ng doctor ko mag kaka-anak na daw ako...itong buwan na ito... kailangan pag-trabahuhan ko na na mabuntis ako! brickwall Hello? As if naman, ilang years ko na rin pinagta-trabahuhan ito. Hindi lang yan... bingo pinag darasal ko pa. Kaya lang, sabi nga ng Tito kong Belgian, "one does not get pregnant just by hoping and praying... Shame on you ... two has to work for it to happen".


Eh, lintik! Mad Ang hirap kaya gumawa ng bata. whisper Hindi ka ba naman magkanda hubo't-hubad, not to mention pag-papawisan ka pa ng husto at kapag winter time, tamarin ka na lang sa lamig... dahil sa totoo lang pati bum mo ay mangungulubot, tapos sasabihan ka pa ng ganun! razz Maniwala pa kaya ako doon? Hay nako! Ang buhay nga naman. Hindi ko alam kung niloloko lang ako ng mga doktor dito sa Alemanya. Tulad ng problema ko sa binti na hanggang ngayon ay hindi pa rin sigurado ang doktor kung ano at saan nanggaling ang sakit ko na ito. sad

Nako! shrug Eniwey, mabalik ako sa doktor ko na nagsabi na magka-kaanak na daw ako. Sa kanya daw kasi, ang pasyente na hindi nagkaka-anak ay napapa-anak niya. Tulad na lang daw noong isang Moroccan na Ginang. 44 years old at never pang nag-ka anak or nabuntis man lang. Pumunta sa kanya, at ayun...makaraan ang tatlong buwan ay nabuntis nga. Nung nanganak ng lalaki ang Ginang, lubos ang katuwaan nito. Sa Muslim kasi mahalaga ang lalaki. Kaya, ayun, simula noon ay dumami na nang dumami ang pasyente nyang Muslim. thinks Okay, sa loob-loob ko lang, hangga't hindi siya ang ama ng magiging anak ko, magba-bakasakali na rin ako sa kanya. Baka nga naman magkaroon ng Himala sa kanya tulad nga ng na sabi niya! Nang bumalik ako sa kanya, may kasabay akong Pilipina. Dina- daing niya na masakit daw ang puson niya. Matapos akong ma eksamen ng doktor ay sumunod na ang aking kakilala.

snore snore
Makaraan ang kinse minutos,lumabas ang Pinay galing sa consultation room, namumutla at nagmamadali siya. Napa sugod naman tuloy ako sa kanya at sinundan ko para itanong kung ano ang nangyari sa konsultasyon niya. Nanginginig siyang sinabi sa akin na buntis daw siya! Hah? Ito na ba ang himala na hinihintay ko? Totoo ba ito? Napigilan tuloy ako at napa-isip. Kung totoo man, kailangan malaman ko. Pina-salaysay ko kung ano ang ginawa ng kaibigan ko sa loob ng clinic ng doctor. Nabanggit niya na matapos siyang sundutin at himut-himutin ay nag paalam siya sa doktor na lalabas para lang umihi. Pumayag naman ang doktor at sabing maghi-hintay daw siya para tapusin ang kaniyang pag eeksamen sa aking kaibigan. sailing Nang bumalik ang kaibigan ko ay naka sunod na ang nurse sa kanya. May iniabot ito sa doktor at sabay napa-tingin ang huli sa aking kaibigan. Pagkatapos ng ilang segundo ay sinabi niya: "Congratulations, you are having a baby!"... Na shock ang kaibigan ko. At nabulatlat niya na lang ay: aber wie? threadhead Paano nga naman nangyari iyun eh, wala pang asawa ang Pinay at ang kasintahan naman ay nasa Pilipinas pa.


surrender Napa-pause naman ang doktor at nagmadaling gumawa ng isa pang test kung positive nga ba or negative ang pregnancy test. Makaraan ang ilang minuto pa, lumabas na ang katotohanan. Hindi buntis ang kaibigan ko. sorry Inaatake lang siya ng UTI. Binigyan siya ng doktor ng resita ng gamot na kailangan niyang bilhin at pina-alalahanan na kung hindi pa rin titigil ang sakit na kanyang nararamdaman sa loob ng tatlong araw, dapat mag balik siya dito. Hay nako! Akala ko pa naman ay may himala na. Wala pala talagang himala! Ngayon mas nainiwala na ako kay Nora Aunor. Kaya pala puro ampon lang din ang mga anak niya!
moon